Don’t You Know What Causes That?

Posted August 25, 2014 by Prairie Wife - 19 comments

Some of you may have noticed our new heading at (and on Twitter and FB). Our “family” of shoes lined up in a row changes every few months along with the seasons. A few of our readers have noticed that there is an extra pair of shoes in our most recent lineup and inquired as to why…

CowBaby5Yup, it’s true, CowBaby5 is cooking in the oven as we speak! My due date is February 16th which puts me at 15 weeks pregnant today. The Cowkids are to the moon, and it’s really a tossup as to which Cowkid is the most excited. As a pregnant mother with four children already on the ground I’ve noticed that complete strangers often feel very comfortable coming up and asking me questions. So, I thought we could all save ourselves some time if I answer the most common questions here and simply direct them to

In true Prairie Wife style I have decided to put my actual answers to the questions as well as what I am really thinking and would really like to say…after all I’m all about honesty here.

angry ladyQuestion: Don’t you know what causes that (keep in mind they usually are gesturing to my herd of children and shooting a disparaging glance at my swollen belly)?
Response: Small smile and fake laughter followed by “I guess not!”
Inner Monologue: If you’ve seen The Cowboy in a worn pair of Wranglers, muddy boots, and a cowboy hat you’d know why we have so many kids! Or sometimes if I’ve having a bad day I would really like to say…Nope, could you please explain it to me? Or even better…why yes I do…followed by an explanation.

Question: Was it planned?
Response: Yup!
Inner Monologue: First of all even if it wasn’t it is none of your business. And second of all yes, every one of my children was very much planned and prayed for, we like kids around here!

Question: Why are you having more, you already had a boy and a girl?
Response: The more the merrier!
Inner Monologue: So if I only had boys, or just girls, it would be OK to keep going…but because I have my token boy and girl I need to stop? Also, the more kids the more help around the house when they get older (free slave labor)…not to mention each kid is a TAX BREAK. P.S. They are all bought and paid for, none of your hard earned tax dollars are funding my kids.

Question: Thank God it’s you not me! (that’s more of a statement not a question)
Response: Smile
Inner Monologue: I mean what the heck am I supposed to say to that? In the two minutes you’ve seen me does my life look that terrible? And also, yes, thank God it is me…someone who is excited about having children and considers them blessings rather than burdens. P.P.S. Yes they all have the same dad, except for Cowgirl G…she’s from the UPS man (I love my Amazon Prime).

Question: Aren’t you exhausted all the time?
Response: Nope, it’s not my first rodeo!
Inner Monologue: Yes exhaustion is a hazard that comes with my job, and thank you for reminding me. Also, is that your way of offering to babysit for me?!

I have to add…I get that most of these are well intentioned but really…it would be nice to simply hear “Oh what a blessing you must be so happy!”

What questions have you been asked when pregnant that drive you nuts?!

Copyright: lisafx / 123RF Stock Photo

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19 thoughts on "Don’t You Know What Causes That?"

  1. Erica says:

    Are you for real?? Do people actually say these things to you?! When I am pregnant, it bothers me that others feel it is okay to comment on my body. “You look like you are about to pop!” At 7 months pregnant. Or “Wow! You are huge!” What?!

    1. Prairie Wife says:

      Oh those belly statements can be rough depending on the day! And yes people say those things to me and more…every time!

  2. TX2Steppin' says:

    So excited for us, and can’t wait to meet my new niece or nephew! And, I can attest to the fact that PW does hear all those comments but answers with grace in true Prairie Wife style!

    1. Prairie Wife says:

      Lol thanks sis 🙂

  3. TallGirlJ says:

    Great read. While I myself am only having #3 I too have gotten almost all those comments. So crazy! And I am with Erica on the size comments… maybe i am just hormonal 😉

    1. Prairie Wife says:

      Lol I have a feeling that with this baby I might be a touch more sensitive to the size comments I’ll be hearing than I have been in the past 😉

  4. College BFF says:

    Well just this weekend with my 1 child at a farmers market where you would think that the vegetables there were the last on earth… As I’m trying to fight the herd to get a couple zucchini’s a lady says you know this would be easier if you left her at home. I was shocked and appalled at the same time. I don’t have as much class as prairie wife so I responded if your dog wasn’t in my way I wouldn’t have any problem 😉

    1. Prairie Wife says:

      That’s my girl lol! And was that her way of offering to babysit (not that you’d let her near your kid)?

  5. Lizzi says:

    Ugggg!!! This seems to have been perfectly timed, cause Saturday was the worst day of comments we have ever had! Probably my fault for going to Walmart on a Saturday but it had to be done!

    I think the worst was

    Random guy: Is this one a girls also? (Referring to my huge belly)
    Me: yes with a smile
    RG: ugh I won’t even say anything cause it would be my horrible luck that I would only get girls too!
    Me: Oh, we are really excited to be welcoming our 4th girl, they are great!
    RG: well you probably shouldn’t try for a boy… just saying!

    Yep, it happened! I was shocked and probably less than graceful at the end, I really just wanted to punch him and cry all at the same time!

    1. Prairie Wife says:

      I know right, ugh people are so insensitive with their comments?! PS we all know those girls are gonna take over the world…in a good way 😉

  6. Pa says:

    Just tell them to #$%#*$#^#$( off. If they could have kids as wonderful as yours they’d want more too.

    1. Prairie Wife says:

      LOL thanks Pa…but I think I’ll just keep that as an inner monologue 😉

  7. Nik says:

    Dang straight the more the merrier! My “go to” response is usually: “Yup, and in pretty lucky because these are great kids.” Although, there are days when a “not so nice” response is warranted.

    So happy for your growing brood!

    1. Prairie Wife says:

      I know, I often say they bring more joy than pain…and most days that’s true 😉

  8. Nicole says:

    I can’t tell you how happy reading this made me in an empathy sort of way. I’m kidless by choice at 33 and I’m still constantly amazed at the things strangers feel it’s ok to say to me about my life choices, so I guess reading this made me realize no matter what I did crazy folks would be all up in my business.

    Sometimes I read your posts and I think you must be nuts, but you’ve talked about having lots of kids since high school and clearly you’re happy, so go you! It’s not the life I’d want for myself, but you’d feel the same way about mine. We can be happy for each other and happy in our own lives without taking anything away from each other. I can’t imagine why folks can’t adopt a “you do you” mindset and stop judging the crap out of everyone else.

    (For the record, and so everyone else can feel better about themselves, I’m selfish, I’m going to change my mind, I’m going to regret it, I’m not going to have anyone to take care of me when I’m old, I’m going to change my mind, I’m being silly and rash, I”m offending all moms, ever, I’m going to change my mind and my life won’t be complete or know true love until I have kids)

    1. Prairie Wife says:

      It is a sad truth that there will always be people who think you’re doing it wrong…no mater what “it” is! I applaud you in making the choice to not have kids, because it’s the right choice for YOU! My brother and his wife have made the same choice and I say heck yeah if you don’t want then DON’T HAVE THEM! I want mine, and there are still days when I’d pay someone to take them away for a few hours…I guess it just goes to show, that with a lot of things on this earth, we have a lot more work to do!

  9. Cherie says:

    Bravo, awesome post and you made this mama feel 10x better!

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