You’re Never Going To Be Good Enough
Posted September 29, 2020 by Prairie Wife - 2 comments
You’re never going to be good enough.
That friend, co-worker, family member, or mom at school that decided to snub you, make you feel less than, talk behind your back, or be flat out aggressively rude to your face…
You’re never going to be good enough for them.
I’m giving you permission now to let it go.
Stop trying, and embrace the peace that accepting this fact will bring.
You can call weekly, text the best GIFs ever, offer to help anytime they ask for it, come to the meeting looking perfectly put together with their favorite coffee and homemade chocolate chip cookies and it STILL WON’T BE GOOD ENOUGH.
You can spend hours awake in the middle of the night looking over the last few years of behavior trying to figure out what started it all, and it won’t make a difference.
You’re never going to be good enough for some people and it’s time to stop wasting your energy and time trying.
You do you, and let them feel however the heck they want to about it because guess what?
How they behave says everything about THEM and nothing about you.
Sure it hurts your feelings when your coworker completely tears apart your ideas at the meeting, or a family member blatantly ignores you when you ask them how they are.
But, anyone watching it happen will only think less of them, not you.
What are they going to say?
“Oh did you see Becky go say hi to Suzy and ask how her kids are? That’s so rude of her!”
Chances are, they didn’t even notice, and if they did and it comes up in conversation the conversation will likely go like this…
“Did you see Becky go say hi to Suzy and Suzy rolled her eyes and ignored her? Wonder what Suzy’s problem is?”
Because let me tell you, that’s the trick right there.
Grit and grace.
Chances are you won’t be able to completely avoid these people, and you can’t ever change their behavior, but you CAN change yours.
You’re never going to be good enough for them, so just be YOU.
Don’t make yourself smaller to make them feel better.
Wear the outfit that makes you feel strong and confident.
Have a blast being with people that respect you.
Stand tall and greet the grouch with a smile and act like you have no idea that every time they are forced to interact with you their right eye twitches a bit.
It’s not fake to be respectful to someone you know has a distinct dislike for you.
It’s taking the high road, being a good human, and being thoughtful about others around you and how they feel.
It’s setting a good example for them…I doubt they’ll pick up on it but it’s worth a try.
No need to be sticky sweet, but DO give this “hater” the same respect you’d give anyone else you interact with in the world.
Grit and grace.
If you know this person will be at an event that you don’t really want to attend anyway, give yourself permission to bow out gracefully.
But, I am going to repeat this again, DO NOT change who you are or what you want to do because it might make them uncomfortable.
I’ve found that most of these people when given the chance to have an authentic conversation about their issues don’t have enough of a spine to talk about it anyway.
After all, if you ask them what’s going on they would have to take ownership of their poor behavior or give you a chance to apologize.
And if that happens…how can they justify their anger anymore?
You’re never going to be good enough for some people.
And that’s okay.
Because for every single person that rolls their eyes when you talk, unfriends you on Facebook, or makes you feel less than…
There are a dozen more that think of you as a gift.
Family and friends that see all the beauty and good you put into the world.
People that love you wholly and perfectly exactly how you are.
And wouldn’t you rather put your energy towards people like that?
NOTE: If we’re being honest, we’ve all at one time or another been the one putting out the negative vibes in a situation like this, or maybe that’s you right now.
If you’re struggling to treat someone in your life with respect, I encourage you to take some time to reflect, change your attitude, offer grace to others, and try and solve the conflict in a mature way.
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